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Marriage therapists teach a skill called active listening. Each partner takes a turn listening, then paraphrases what he’s heard
Marriage therapists teach a skill called active listening. Each partner takes a turn listening, then paraphrases what he’s heard
admin
2014-01-13
40
问题
Marriage therapists teach a skill called active listening. Each partner takes a turn listening, then paraphrases what he’s heard and validates it. There is, however, a problem. It rarely works. For 80 percent of couples, active listening is too hard. It feels wooden, like emotional gymnastics. Nor does "fighting well predict happy marriages". Even happy couples have screaming matches. Every time you raise a hot-button issue, such as the in-laws or money, does your husband suddenly clam up? More than 80 percent of the time, it’s the wife who brings up sticky material issues, while the husband tries to avoid discussing them. This isn’t a symptom of a troubled marriage — it’s true in most happy marriages.
You’ll often hear that staying in a bad marriage is worse for everybody concerned — especially the children — than getting divorced. That may be true if your home is. so riddled with hostility that it’s like a war zone. But University of Chicago sociologist Linder J. Waite says she has found that 75 percent of couples who rated their marriages as miserable but stayed of married were happy five years later.
We usually think the strongest marriages are those that survive major traumas, such as bankruptcy or an extramarital affair. But frequently, dealing with the little things, those daily annoyances, eat away at a marriage. "Every couple experiences disappointment as initial romance and passion fade and they discover all their differences," says Wolin. "He doesn’t do enough housework. She is too emotional. He watches too much TV. She’s too lenient with the kids. People think these differences as problem, but they’re actually opportunities to build marital muscles. "
The phrase "clam up" in Line 5 means______.
选项
A、shut up
B、get up
C、back up
D、tighten up
答案
A
解析
语义题。根据clam up所在句之后的一句wife…brings up sticky material issues,接着转折whilethe husband tries to avoid discussing them.当妻子发起比较尖锐的话题时,丈夫不愿意讨论,clam up与avoid discussing them意思接近。故答案为A。
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0
考博英语
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