首页
外语
计算机
考研
公务员
职业资格
财经
工程
司法
医学
专升本
自考
实用职业技能
登录
外语
The Art of Friendship A)One evening a few years ago I found myself in an anxiety. Nothing was really wrong — my family and I wer
The Art of Friendship A)One evening a few years ago I found myself in an anxiety. Nothing was really wrong — my family and I wer
admin
2013-11-21
103
问题
The Art of Friendship
A)One evening a few years ago I found myself in an anxiety. Nothing was really wrong — my family and I were healthy, my career was busy and successful — I was just feeling vaguely down and in need of a friend who could raise my spirits, someone who would meet me for coffee and let me rant until the clouds lifted. I dialed my best friend, who now lives across the country in California, and got her voicemail. That’s when it started to dawn on me — lonesomeness was at the root of my dreariness. My social life had dwindled to almost nothing, but somehow until that moment I’d been too busy to notice. Now it hit me hard. My old friends, buddies since college or even childhood, knew everything about me; when they left, they had taken my context with them.
B)Research has shown the long-range negative consequences of social isolation on one’s health. But my concerns were more short-term. I needed to feel understood right then in the way that only a girl friend can understand you. I knew it would be wrong to expect my husband to replace my friends: He couldn’t, and even if he could, to whom would I then complain about my husband? So I resolved to acquire new friends — women like me who had kids and enjoyed rolling their eyes at the world a little bit just as I did. Since I’d be making friends with more intention than I’d ever given the process, I realized I could be selective, that I could in effect design my own social life. The downside, of course, was that I felt pretty frightened.
C)After all, it’s a whole lot harder to make friends in midlife than it is when you’re younger — a fact woman I’ve spoken with point out again and again. As Leslie Danzig, 41, a Chicago theater director and mother, sees it, when you’re in your teens and 20s, you’re more or less friends with everyone unless there’s a reason not to be. Your college roommate becomes your best pal at least partly due to proximity. Now there needs to be a reason to be friends. "There are many people I’m comfortable around, but 1 wouldn’t go so far as to call them friends. Comfort isn’t enough to sustain a real friendship," Danzig says.
D)At first, finding new companions felt awkward. At 40 I couldn’t run up to people the way my4-year-old daughters do in the playground and ask, "Will you be my friend?" "Every time you start a new relationship, you’re vulnerable again," agrees Kathleen Hall, D Min, founder and CEO of the Stress Institute, in Atlanta. "You’re asking, ’Would you like to come into my life?’ It makes us self-conscious."
E)Fortunately, my discomfort soon passed. I realized that as a mature friend seeker my vulnerability risk was actually pretty low. If someone didn’t take me up on my offer, so what: I wasn’t in junior high, when I might have been rejected for having the wrong clothes or hair. At my age I have amassed enough self-esteem to realize that I have plenty to offer.
F)We’re all so busy, in fact, that mutual interests — say, in a project, class, or cause that we already make time for — become the perfect catalysts for bringing us in contact with candidates for camaraderie. Michelle Mertes, 35, a teacher and mother of two in Wausau, Wisconsin, says anew friend she made at church came as a pleasant surprise. "In high school I chose friends based on their popularity and how being part of their circle might reflect on me. Now’s it’s our shared values and activities that count." Mertes says her pal, with whom she organized the church’s youth programs, is nothing like her but their drive and organizational skills make them ideal friends.
G)Happily, as awkward as making new friends can be, self-esteem issues do not factor in — or if they do, you can easily put them into perspective. Danzig tells of the mother of a child in her son’s preschool, a tall, beautiful woman who is married to a big-deal rock musician. "I said to my husband, ’she’s too cool for me,’" she jokes. "I get intimidated by people. But once I got to know her, she turned out to be pretty laid-back and friendly." In the end there was no chemistry between them, so they didn’t become good pals. "I realized that we weren’t each other’s type, but it wasn’t about hierarchy." What midlife friendship is about, it seems, is reflecting the person you’ve become(or are still becoming)back at yourself, thus reinforcing the progress you’ve made in your life.
H)Harlene Katzman, 41, a lawyer in New York City, notes that her oldest friends knew her back when she was less sure of herself. As much as she loves them, she believes they sometimes respond to issues in light of who she once was. An old chum has the goods on you. With recently made friends, you can turn over a new leaf.
I)A new friend, chosen right, can also help you point your boat in the direction you want to go. Hanna Dershowitz, 39, an attorney and mother in Los Angeles, found that a new acquaintance from work was exactly what she needed in a friend. In addition to liking and respecting Julia, Dershowitz had a feeling that the fit and athletic younger woman would help her to get in shape.
J)While you’re busy making new friends, remember that you still need to nurture your old ones. We asked Maria Paul, author of The Friendship Crisis: Finding, Making, and Keeping Friends When You’re Not a Kid Anymore, for the best ways to maintain these important relationships. Keep in touch. Your friends should be a priority; schedule regular lunch dates or coffee catch-up sessions, no matter how busy you are. Know her business. Keep track of important events in a friend’s life and show your support. Call or e-mail to let her know you’re thinking of her. Speak your mind. Tell a friend(politely)if something she did really upset you. If you can’t be totally honest, then you need to reexamine the relationship. Accept her flaws. No one is perfect, so work around her quirks — she’s chronically late, or she’s a bit negative -— to cut down on frustration and fights. Boost her ego. Heartfelt compliments make everyone feel great, so tell her how much you love her new sweater or what a great job she did on a work project.
According to Michelle Mertes, midlife friendship is based on the shared values and activities
选项
答案
F
解析
细节题。由句子中的Michelle Mertes可定位至F)段。Mertes说:上中学时,我是根据她们的受欢迎程度以及成为她们圈子的一员可能对我产生的影响来选择朋友的。现在,共同的价值观和参加的活动则成为我选择朋友的关键因素。
转载请注明原文地址:https://kaotiyun.com/show/byS7777K
0
大学英语四级
相关试题推荐
WhenRobertoFelizcametotheUSAfromtheDominicanRepublic,heknewonlyafewwordsofEnglish.Educationsoonbecamea【S1】
Whensheinterviewsteachingcandidates,principalLaurelTellerfavorstheoneswhoshowtheyhaveaheartforchildren,notju
Languageislearnedprimarilythroughcommunicationwithotherpeople.Researchshowsthatthemorecommunicationchildren【S1】__
A、Shedidn’tunderstandwhatJanewassaying.B、Janeshouldhavebeenmoreactive.C、Janeneedstraininginpublicspeakingless
Ihearmanyparentscomplainingthattheirteenagechildrenarerebelling.Iwishitwereso.Atyourageyououghttobegrowin
TheAustralianPartiesTheAustralianpoliticalsceneisdominatedbytwomajorpartiesthathavequitedifferentpolitical
A、adogB、acatC、aratD、asnakeC细节题。对话中房东提出公寓里不许养大型动物。如dogs,cats,snakes;想租房子的人说他有只养在笼子里的老鼠,房东同意只要老鼠不跑出来就可以养了,所以正确答案是rat,其他的都是
A、Janegotaletterfromherhometoday.B、Janeisexpectingaletterfromherfamilytoday.C、Janewrotealettertoherfamily
AmericanKaroshi(过劳死)Workaholics(工作狂)inAmericaAthin,40-somethingmanwithscatteredwhitehairandwan(苍白的)complex
Modernmass-productionmethodslowerthecostofmakinggoods,andthusgiveusbettervalues.Atthesametime,Americaningenu
随机试题
新载树木根系与土地新的平衡的建立与________有关。
某学龄儿童采用0.05%NAF漱口水预防龋齿,其使用方法应为()
将数据0.53624、0.0014、0.25、1.6、10.0相加,正确的结果是()。
工程项目的质量内涵包括()。
根据《合同法》的规定,当事人约定的()低于违约所造成的损失的,受损失一方当事人可以请求人民法院或者仲裁机构予以增加。
为了了解学生的实验能力的进步程度,教师设计了如下的实验报告评分表,这种评分表属于()。
(1)从4名男生和2名女生中任选3人参加演讲比赛。求所选3人中至少有1名女生的概率。(2)对某种产品的6件不同的正品和4件不同的次品,一一进行测试,至区分出所有次品为止,若所有次品恰好在第5次测试时全部发现,则这样的测试方法有多少种?
下列不符合教师作为学习促进者角色的行为是()。
明代有“薄金可以养廉”,但如今新加坡却提倡“高薪养廉”。对这两种观点你有什么看法?
(1)在名称为Form1的窗体上画1个名称为Framel、标题为“学位”的框架;框架内有1个名称为Option1的控件数组,该控件数组含有4个标题分别为“学士”、“硕士”、“博士”和“其他”的单选按钮,它们的Index属性分别为0、1、2、3,且标题为“硕
最新回复
(
0
)