首页
外语
计算机
考研
公务员
职业资格
财经
工程
司法
医学
专升本
自考
实用职业技能
登录
外语
The Lost Art of Listening "Why won’t he even listen to my idea?" "Why am I cut off before I provide the whole story?" How ma
The Lost Art of Listening "Why won’t he even listen to my idea?" "Why am I cut off before I provide the whole story?" How ma
admin
2013-04-06
24
问题
The Lost Art of Listening
"Why won’t he even listen to my idea?" "Why am I cut off before I provide the whole story?" How many times have you been frustrated by someone not listening to what you have to say? How many times have you frustrated others by not listening to them?
We tend to think that listening is the same as hearing; but listening is the art of being alert to the problems of the person you are with. Problems caused by not listening can be serious, not only at work, but also with family and friends.
Many times we jump in to say what’s on our minds before we’ve even acknowledged what the other person has said, short circuiting the possibility of mutual understanding. Speaking without listening, hearing without understanding. In fact we’re often baffled and dismayed by the feeling of being left sitting around in the dark.
Good managers are good listeners
Effective managers are proactive (主动的) listeners. They don’t wait for members of their staff to come to them; they make an active effort to find out what people think and feel by asking them. The manager who meets frequently with staff members keeps informed and, even more importantly, communicates interest in the people themselves.
An open-door policy allows access, but it doesn’t substitute for an active campaign of reaching out and listening to people. The manager who doesn’t ask questions communicates that he or she doesn’t care. And if he or she doesn’t listen, the message is "I’m not there for you." Even if a manager decides not to follow a subordinate’s suggestion, listening with sincere interest conveys respect and makes the employee feel appreciated.
Communicating by memo or e-mail—however witty or informal—is not substitute for personal contact, because it closes off the chance to listen.
Simply going through the motions of meeting with people doesn’t work either. The fake listener doesn’t fool anyone. Poor eye contact, shuffling feet, busy hands, and meaningless replies, like "That’s interesting" and "Is that right?" give them away. The insincere listener’s lack of interest in the conversation betrays a larger problem: lack of interest in the person with whom the listener is communicating.
Most people don’t listen with the intent to understand; they listen with the intent to reply. Even at work, where performance takes priority over relationships, listening carefully to understand the other person’s point of view—before you even think about replying—is the key to productive communication.
Effective managers develop a routine in which communication time is an integral part of the job. They meet with their staff and ask questions. They don’t react before gathering all the facts. If they don’t know what their people are thinking and feeling, they ask—and they listen.
What if your boss doesn’t listen?
When we don’t feel heard by our superiors, few of us give up right away. We write memos, we ask to meet with them, we try to communicate our needs and convey our points of view. Then we give up. Frequently, we complain to our coworkers and our family and friends.
Venting feelings of frustration with third parties rather than addressing conflicts at their source can take on epidemic proportions in work settings. Sometimes it takes the form of gossip, running down someone who’s not present.
But, some of you might be thinking, my boss really is insensitive. I’ve tried to talk to him, and he just doesn’t listen. The mistake people make in trying to get through to unreceptive superiors is the same mistake most of us make in dealing with the difficult people in our lives: we try to change them. And when that doesn’t work, we give up.
Instead, start by examining your own expectations. What do you want and how are you programmed to go about getting it? Are you expecting to have your personal needs met at work? Do you work hard and wait patiently for the boss to tell you that you’re doing a great job, like a good little boy or girl?
Be careful
Listening is important at work because it enables people to understand each other, get along and get the job done. But don’t get too personal. Don’t let your compassion allow someone to talk about dieir personal problems, which is interfering with work. This may be happening if you’re the only person he talks to.
A good supervisor keeps channels of communication open—and keeps them focused on the task at hand— by asking for frequent feedback about how things are going (on the job).
"What do you like and dislike so far about working here?"
"Is there anything you think we should change to make things smoother?"
Remember that it can be intimidating for subordinates to give criticism or make suggestions. If you want them to feel safe enough to open up, reassure them that you appreciate their ideas.
"I’m glad you spoke up."
"Thanks for letting me know."
"I didn’t realize... I’m glad you told me."
Listening to the people we work with isn’t the same as becoming friends with them. Many people worry that if we allow ourselves to get personal at the workplace, things might get sticky. But those who think that effective teamwork isn’t about listening (it’s about getting things done) are wrong. Without being heard we are diminished, as workers and as people.
Keep in mind the difference between dissent (异议) and defiance (挑衅). Defiance means attacking the other person’s position and making him wrong. Dissent means having the courage to stand up for what you think and feel. It’s the difference between saying "You’re wrong" and "This is how I feel." Clearly, a dissenting message is much easier to hear than a defiant one. The listener is more willing and interested in hearing a dissenter’s objection. Someone who hears a defiant objection will tend to either ignore the comment or be rudely counter-defiant. This is a common problem that tends to increase barriers between people, something you don’t want in a work environment where teamwork is necessary.
Careful listening is difficult and takes practice to improve. Try harder to understand the other person’s perspective.
It is not allowed to talk about personal problems at work, because______.
选项
A、it is harmful to decision-making
B、it is harmful to mental health
C、it interferes with work
D、it interferes with your life
答案
C
解析
原文该句中的非限制定语从句实际上解释了为什么不要让人谈论私人问题,即影响工作,因此本题答案为C。
转载请注明原文地址:https://kaotiyun.com/show/XTr7777K
0
大学英语四级
相关试题推荐
A、Whentheecologicalbalanceoftheriverislost.B、Whenpeopleconsumemorefishthantheyusedto.C、Whenlargenumbersofa
Ifthemanagementprovidespleasantbackgroundmusicandbeautifiesthedullsetting,_________________(工厂的生产效率就可以大大提高).
Inspiteof"endlesstalkofdifference",Americansocietyisanamazingmachineforhomogenizingpeople.Thisis"thedemocrati
Theinternet____________(对产生深远的影响)people’slifestyleandvaluesystems.
After1785,theproductionofchildren’sbooksintheUnitedStatesincreasedbutremainedlargelyreprintsofBritishbooks,of
A、Theapplicationisn’tavailableattheoffice.B、Thewomanshouldmailacopyofherapplication.C、Thephotocopymachineisn’
Weoftenthinkofagricultureasplantingseedsandharvestingcrops.Butmanycropsdonotcomefromseeds.Manykindsoftrees
A、Theinventionofmachines.B、Theinventionofthealphabet.C、Theinventionofrockets.D、Theinventionofagriculture.D
Forthispart,youareallowed30minutestowriteacompositiononthetitleGlobalWarming.Youshouldwriteatleast120word
A、TheIrish.B、TheBlacks.C、TheChinese.D、TheIndians.D事实题。通过浏览选项可知,本题问的是与“哪个国家的人”有关的话题,听短文时对此要一一记录相关信息,听到“Atlastalmostev
随机试题
我国“一文一事”工作制度始于
A.按季度向国家药品不良反应监测专业机构报告B.应分析评价后及时报告C.进行核实,于3日内向国家药品不良反应监测专业机构报告D.15个工作日内报告E.每季度向国家食品药品监督管理局和卫生部报告国家药品不良反应监测专业机构对一般的药品不良反应病例
行政机关在调查或者进行检查时,执法人员一般应为()。
人民币票面上所标示的货币单位无一例外是“圆”字,但从法理角度看,《中国人民银行法》规定:人民币的单位为元,人民币辅币单位为角、分。这明白清楚地从法律角度对人民币单位作了规定,即元为人民币合法的货币单位。圆有表达货币单位的意思,那是指在历史上。《中国人民银行
“CoreCompetence”通行的中文翻译是“核心竞争力”,但它的准确译法应该是核心能力。所谓“核心能力”,不是一个公司独有的某种技术或工艺,也不是公司内部某个人或某个部门的能力,而是指公司整合不同的生产技能和技术后形成的一种综合能力,是公司集体学习
“马斯特杯2015年中国机器人大赛”中的足球赛正在进行,有三位教授对决赛结果进行预测:赵教授说:“冠军不是清华大学队,也不是浙江大学队。”钱教授说:“冠军不是清华大学队,而是中国科技大学队。”孙教授说:“冠军不是中国科技大学队,而是清华大学队。”比
方程y"一3y’+2y=2ex的通解为________.
一般情况下,当对关系R和S进行自然连接时,要求R和S含有一个或者多个共有的
______theworseIseemtofeel.
A、Therestaurantlocation.B、Therestaurantatmosphere.C、Thefoodvariety.D、Thefoodprice.B男士提到他总是尽可能提供最新鲜的食物,并将饭店的氛围营造得尽可能舒
最新回复
(
0
)