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  3. More than 50 years ago, the psychologist Carl Rogers suggested that simply loving our children wasn’t enough. We have to love th

More than 50 years ago, the psychologist Carl Rogers suggested that simply loving our children wasn’t enough. We have to love th

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问题    More than 50 years ago, the psychologist Carl Rogers suggested that simply loving our children wasn’t enough. We have to love them unconditionally — for who they are, not for what they do.
   As a father, I know this is a tall order, but it becomes even more challenging now that so much of the advice we are given amounts to exactly the opposite. In effect, we’re given tips in conditional parenting, which comes in two flavors: turn up the affection when they’re good, withhold affection when they’re not.
   Conditional parenting isn’t limited to old-school authoritarians. Some people who wouldn’t dream of spanking choose instead to discipline their young children by forcibly isolating them, a tactic we call "time out. " Conversely, "positive reinforcement" teaches children that they are loved only when they do whatever we decide is a " good job. " The primary message of all types of conditional parenting is that children must earn a parent’s love.
   The child psychologist Bruno Bettelheim, who readily acknowledged that the version of negative conditional parenting known as time-out can cause " deep feelings of anxiety," nevertheless endorsed it for that very reason. " When our words are not enough," he said, " the threat of the withdrawal of our love and affection is the only sound method to impress on him that he had better conform to our request.
   But research suggests that love withdrawal isn’t particularly effective at getting compliance, much less at promoting moral development. Even if we did succeed in making children obey us, is obedience worth the possible long-term psychological harm? Should parental love be used as a tool for controlling children?
   Albert Bandura, the father of the branch of psychology known as social learning theory, declared that unconditional love " would make children directionless and quite unlovable" — an assertion entirely unsupported by empirical studies. The idea that children accepted for who they are would lack direction or appeal is most informative for what it tells us about the dark view of human nature held by those who issue such warnings.
   In practice, unconditional acceptance should be accompanied by actively imagining how things look from the child’s point of view. Most of us would protest that of course we love our children without any strings attached. But what counts is how things look from the perspective of the children — whether they feel just as loved when they mess up or fall short.
According to the passage, in practicing unconditional acceptance it is essential for parents to______.
选项 A、show respect for children’s ideas
B、set a moral example for children
C、consider environmental factors
D、watch for children’s frustrations
答案A
解析 本题是推理题，考查对第七段第一句和第三句话的理解，关键点:．．．actively imagining how things look from the child’s point of view…，…how things look from the perspective of the children…。
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