首页
外语
计算机
考研
公务员
职业资格
财经
工程
司法
医学
专升本
自考
实用职业技能
登录
外语
Benjie Goodhart is in his late 30s, adores his partner and has a young son. But the thought of marriage has paralyzed him with f
Benjie Goodhart is in his late 30s, adores his partner and has a young son. But the thought of marriage has paralyzed him with f
admin
2011-04-11
38
问题
Benjie Goodhart is in his late 30s, adores his partner and has a young son. But the thought of marriage has paralyzed him with fear. And it’s all thanks to his parents’ perfect marriage. Benjie Goodheart felt the pressure of wanting an idealized version of his parents’ relationship.
According to Christine Northam, a relationship counselor with Relate. "It’s like having a terribly clever elder brother at school—it sets a competitive standard," she says. "It’s a normal anxiety about a big change, and you’ve got the added pressure of wanting an idealized version of your parents’ relationship. " It seems such anxiety is not uncommon. "As much as it’s hard to cope with parents being imperfect, cheating, splitting," says therapist Tracey Cox, "it is sometimes harder to be presented with the ideal happy marriage. " Avy Joseph is a cognitive behavioral therapist and founder of CityMinds. "It’s quite common for people to put pressure on themselves," he says, "if they’ve grown up in an environment where, in their view, things have been perfect. "
Overcoming these fears involves accepting your marriage may not be perfect, but if it isn’t you will cope. Just because something isn’t perfect doesn’t mean it’s worthless. And if your marriage ends in divorce, it doesn’t define you as a failure. "Your own worth isn’t dependent on the success of your marriage," says Joseph. Working at Relate, Christine Northam knows no marriage is perfect. "I don’t know anybody who is 100% happy with their marriage. Most marriages go through ups and downs. You’re idealizing it. You have a false impression of what real marriage is like. Most married people hate each other at times, frankly. You can’t be perfectly in love all the time. " So marriage is not the happy ending of the fairy-tales. I love the fact that, 44 years after they married, my parents still hold hands, make each other giggle, and tease each other. But they would doubtless balk at the idea that their marriage is perfect. Mum suffers from terrible vertigo, yet Dad persists in taking enormous detours every holiday through a mountain range. Dad could spend a week looking at a ruined church, whereas Mum could do the Acropolis in five minutes flat. Hundreds more took place along the recurring themes of what time to leave for the airport (Mum, six hours before a flight; Dad, six minutes) , how to pour a drink (Mum, fill a large glass to the brim; Dad, quarter-fill a thimble) and how best to pass leisure time (Mum, bulk-buying from catalogue companies; Dad, reading every column inch of the newspaper).
They aren’t perfect. They just love each other enough to deal with the imperfections. As Cox says: "What they are good at is having faith, loving each other and finding compromises to make them both happy. No one breezes through (marriage) without working at it. " And yes, I would hope to have a marriage as successful as theirs. But I know it will take some work. I’m ready for that. I finally got down on one knee this year. After waiting for the perfect romantic moment, I realized it would probably never come. I had prevaricated long enough. So I asked her on the spur of the moment, while I was unpacking the shopping from the car, with Wendy in a bath towel standing in our driveway asking why I’d put Fred in the boot of the car (he’d insisted) while he banged on the rear windscreen, pronouncing loudly about his latest fecal production. The proposal wasn’t on a moonlit beach or over a candlelit dinner, but slap bang in the minutiae of everyday life, in all its hilarious, glorious ridiculousness—and because of the person she is, Wendy loved it. And so it is that I find myself marching towards my impending nuptials, eyes wide open, resolve secure, safe in the knowledge that I am punching well above my weight with the woman who will be my wife. Benjie and Wendy were married last Saturday.
What does "balk" mean in the third paragraph?
选项
A、accept
B、refuse to comply
C、suspect
D、challenge
答案
B
解析
文章第三段中“balk”的意思是什么?该题考查考生的词汇量和对上下文的理解。根据上下文,作者认为没有一段婚姻是完美的,同时举出父母作为实例,所以对于婚姻完美这一观点,父母肯定是不认同的。
转载请注明原文地址:https://kaotiyun.com/show/qNYO777K
0
专业英语八级
相关试题推荐
Thespecializedortechnicallanguageofatrade,profession,orsimilargroupiscalled
Becausesomeresourcesmustbeallocatedatthenationallevel,wehavecreatedpolicieswhichreflecttheaggregatedattributes
Atpresentsomepeopleclaimthatweshouldnotbelievejournalistsbecausewhattheysayintheirreportmightnotbetrue.Do
Linguistshavefoundthatsignlanguagesandspokenlanguagessharemanyfeatures.Likespokenlanguages,whichuseunitsofsou
ThelargestoftheracialandethnicminoritiesintheU.S.isthe______.
人类社会的发展进入了快车道。现代都市文明的产物——抑郁症等心理或精神疾病正开始折磨着人们。心理学家和医生认为21世纪将是心理疾病高发时代。据估计,本世纪大约有3%的人需要心理治疗。大部分人的心理问题可以通过自我调整来控制。不少学者指出,我们应该更加
读书或书籍的享受素来被视为有修养的生活上的一种雅事,而在一些不大有机会享受这种权利的人们看来,这是一种值得尊重和妒忌的事。当我们把一个不读书者和一个读书者的生活上的差异比较一下,这一点便很容易明白。那个没有养成读书习惯的人,以时间和空间而言,是受着他眼前的
TheidealseasonforplantingthecropinthemainfieldisJuly-AugustorNovember-December.Plantingisdoneonraisedbedsof
诚然,这是我们祖宗的伟业,也是对世界的贡献;可是我们为什么不去追问刚刚建国二百多年的美国,为什么会在物质丰富和科学发展上,跨越了我们的五千年?鲁迅先生深刻地剖析了中国国民的性格,才产生了“阿Q”这个人木三分的中国人心态的典型;但是直至今日,中国的“阿Q”还
随机试题
子宫颈糜烂,组织活检报告为鳞状上皮化生,提示病变为
特殊类型上感疱疹性咽峡炎的病原菌为
民事诉讼中,下列说法正确的是()。
竞争机制是()。
在Linux中,可以使用命令()针对文件newfiles.txt为所有用户添加执行权限。
软件质量因素分为3个方面反映了用户对软件质量的要求,下列()不是与产品运行有关的特性。
电子商务的应用范围主要为
若串s="MathTypes",则其子串的数目是
下列表达式用于判断y是否为闰年。闰年的判断条件是:年号能被4整除但不能被100整除或年号能被400整除,请填空______。
Thedoctororderedthepatientto_____allsolidfoodforatleasttwenty-fourhours,
最新回复
(
0
)